Breakfast, Dessert & Breakfast Dessert

and no refined sugar. (Don't worry, it's still me)

For all of you playing along on Twitter, you know I had an encounter this week at Trader Joe’s that sent me reeling.

It was a package of Maple Streusel Bread. This wasn’t a new TJ product that I could wait to try until I was home. I tore open that package, the smell of maple syrup filled the car and my brain space, and I ate a piece of the bread.

The bread itself tasted like a maple brioche; it was topped with a soft streusel and thickly glazed with a maple-flavored glaze.

Anyone who saw The Book of Mormon knows how sinful a maple glaze can be.

Every sugar receptor in my brain began dancing like whirling Dervishes, begging me to eat more, more, more. I complied. How could I not? They demanded it. It was my job to supplicate them. Once home, my little sugar demons demanded I toast the bread. I tried some with butter, some with cream cheese and some untoasted. It was for science! A taste-test to post on TikTok (Hey! follow me @rothkopfbakes). With Trader Joe’s and maple syrup tagged in the video I was assured TikTok stardom. (I am still waiting.)

Just as after a drunken bender, about an hour later, propped up on the couch with Nicole Wallace talking of oath keepers and sedition, and with the smell of maple flavoring all over my fingers, I vowed never-ever to eat the bread again. In fact, I also promised myself I would never-ever eat sugar again.

Which is why you have today’s recipe: a wholesome, nutritious-delicious baked oatmeal. Good hot or cold, you can make it with what you have in the house and put your own spin on the recipe. Best of all, it’s flavored with pure maple syrup and not a drop of refined sugar. I would happily serve this for breakfast or dessert, or dessert breakfast (which is a real thing. don’t@ me.). A dollop of Greek yogurt would be good company.

Don’t worry, I have not given up white and brown sugar. No, no NO. It’s still me, after all. I haven’t been part of some Elon Musk experiment and turned into an AI-controlled baking robot. (Lordie, that man only gets more horrid.)

Enough chatter! The recipe:

Baked Oatmeal a la Apple Pie

With fall here, this warm breakfast makes a super-nice alternative to a bowl of instant oats.

4-6 servings. It keeps up to a week in the fridge. Reheat in the microwave.

What You’ll Need:

2 ounces butter

1 1/2 cups milk (whatever kind you like, from oat to cow)

2 large eggs

1/2 cup real maple syrup

1/4 cup (approximately) mashed banana or applesauce

3 cups old-fashioned oats

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1 teaspoon nutmeg

2 cups diced apples

3/4 cup raisins

zest of one lemon

What You’ll Do:

1. Grease an 8 x 8 or 9 x 9 square pan. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

2. In a large, microwave-safe bowl, melt the butter.

3. Into that bowl add all the ingredients, from milk to lemon zest. Stir well to ensure all the ingredients are evenly blended. If you’re baking with kids, this is definitely one of those dishes where everyone can have a turn stirring.

4. Pour the mixture into the pan and bake for 30 to 40 minutes, until set and golden on top. Ovens vary, pans vary, etc.; baking times are guidelines only.

5. Let cool for 15 minutes. Slice into squares and eat. This can be stored for up to a week in the fridge. Reheat some every morning for breakfast. Isn’t that a nice thing to wake up to?

This recipe is waiting for you to mess with it and make it your own. Keep the basics measures of old-fashioned oats, milk, butter, eggs and syrup, but everything else is yours to play with. I’m going to make a pumpkin bread version and a gingerbread version and a chocolate version and a berry one and…You see?

What’s your favorite addition to oatmeal? What’s your favorite type of apple? Can you believe Trump was using Mafia techniques on the National Archives (you give me all the papers about the Russian hoax, and I’ll give you some papers I stole)? (Of course you can believe it!) What stolen stuff do you think is hiding in Trump’s other homes? Let us know!

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